22w, 2d

So, started writing something this morning and ended up just deleting it all after events from the days transpired. I've been having this pinching feeling since Tuesday evening that seems to be coming from my cervix but who really knows. It had me a bit concerned and lost a little sleep over it. I didn't bother to call my dr though because I had an appointment scheduled for tomorrow. Then today I woke up with some weird soreness that stretched from my right side up over the top of my big belly (I noticed a few days ago that my feet are no longer visible when I just look down) to above my belly button. It was really quite painful, particularly when I moved or even touched my belly. My mom said she was unavailble to help out today which didn't make things any better. I ended up calling her this morning and let her know that I was going to call my dr and would she be able to help out and cancel her plans if I had to go in. I felt completely awful physcially at that point, and felt awful for having to inconvenience her yet again. So there was crying on my part. I dropped my kid off at school and started telling one of the mom friends I have there about how I have been feeling. She put me a little more at ease and told me that she had the pinching cervix thing too. The belly pain wasn't that much of a concern to me. I figured it probably was just heartburn since I forgot to take my Zantac last night, although it did hurt a ton. Then I was off to take my other kid to his speech therapist. My mom called to see how I was doing and I told her I was going to call the dr in a few minutes and would get back to her. She assured me that it wouldn't be a problem for her to come over and watch my kids and that she even got my dad up so he could drive me to the city if I needed him to. Called the dr. Then waited for about 30 minutes for a call back. I was hoping just for some reassurance, and maybe to tell me to take it easy and come in to my appointment tomorrow. Instead I was told to come in this afternoon for an appointment instead. So, called my mom to see if she could watch my kids. She didn't answer. Called her every 5 minutes for about an hour and still nothing. I called my sister to see if maybe she was getting off work early today and could watch my kids. She didn't answer. Called my husband to see if he could come home early. He didn't answer. I think it was around that time that I started crying again. DH sent me a txt saying he was in a meeting so I was at least able to tell him breifly what was going on. He said he could help if I needed him too. After an hour of trying to get a hold of my mom, and about 2 minutes before I was ready to just have DH come home early, my mom finally called back. Good thing it wasn't a big emergency!

Anyway, went to my dr. The first thing the dr wanted to know when he came in the room is if I have been having any signs of preterm labor. (Jim Carey was my dr again today.) So I told him about all that has been going on, and mentioned as well that I have started to have a few Braxton Hicks contractions. He did an u/s and both babies were head down this time, good heart rates, and definitely still boys. He couldn't really figure out where the belly pain was coming from since it seemed to be above my uterus. I got some blood work done to check liver function and a u/s is scheduled to check my gallbladder but I don't know if I am going to keep the appointment. I am still convinced it is indegestion so if I feel better I am not going to torture myself with fasting for 10 hours for an u/s. The transabdominal u/s didn't show anything too weird with my cervix, no funneling or anything like that. He suggested doing a manual check of the cervix to check for softening. I said to go for it, just for peace of mind. Yeah, that HURT! From what he could feel, no dilation but my cervix is about 2 inches long. (Anything under 2 isn't good, so I am on the verge of not being good.) Also, my cervix does seem to be softening which isn't really that great. Normally he would have me come back in 4 weeks but I am going back in 2 instead just in case. He said if I have 4 or more Braxton Hicks an hour over 2 hours to call to come in and be monitored. (I haven't had any today.) No sex (not that I have had any for a couple months). He said I should be fine showering and preparing things to eat and hanging out with my kids, but I shouldn't do doing any chores involved with taking care of a 3 and 4 year old. I am not sure exactly what that last part means. Then I got a flu shot.

And my cervix is really hurting now! Ouch.

I had this dream last night that was terrifying and inspiring all at the same time. I was going to write about it but maybe I will save that until another time since this is already so long.