12w, 2d

Life is different. Or at least it was but I sure that now that I am posting something about it, it will go back just the way it was. I was really hoping that I would wake up at 12w pg and suddenly the morning sickness would be gone. I knew it was just a fantasy but one I was willing to keep hoping for. Tuesday hit and I was 12 weeks on the dot. I threw up 6 times on Tuesday. I did notice however that despite the barfing, not once was it puke-your-guts-out barfing. Also, I felt okay the majority of the day. Not great, but okay. Normally I have been feeling okay for a couple hours of the day and like complete crap the rest of the day. Then along came yesterday. I took the kids to a park to meet some friends. We spent several hours there and I was feeling okay up until the very end where I started feeling really tired and really hot. I threw up (in a trash bag) about 30 seconds after I got into the car to leave. Thew up again when I got home. Then a third time before bed. But once again, no puke-your-guts-out barfing. Plus, I laid down to take a nap like I have been doing for the past 3 or more weeks daily and realized, I didn't really need a nap. I was feeling so good I even went to my kid's soccer practice in the evening. As for today, even better yet! So far. Number of barfs: 0. ZERO! I can hardly believe it. I did two loads of laundry today, went to two stores (with the kids and my mom since I don't think I am quite ready to take the kids out alone yet), skipped napping, and helped rescue a lost lovey who was playing a great game of hide-and-seek. Now if I could just get rid of this headache. Have to say now that I typed all this out, I am really feeling the need to puke. Betting it is going to be a puke-your-guts-out kinda ordeal too just so I don't start getting cocky.

I called today and made an appointment with the peri (high risk dr) again. I tried to explain to my husband and my mom both why I felt it was better to go back than to see my OB. I know my argument sounded weak (not that I really needed an argument since they are both fine with what I decide but I needed to talk it out) but really it comes down to me knowing in my gut that it is the best thing for these babies. I am pretty much expecting that these babies will spend some time in the NICU which means they will be sent off to the hospital in the city where the peri is anyway. If anything goes wrong with me or the delivery or the babies, we will be right there in the best possible place to be. I am not at all excited still about the fact that I will be so far from home and it will be difficult for my family to visit, but like I said, chances are pretty high that the babies and me would end up there anyway. Most of my friends live near the hospital up there and they will keep me company too... right? Now I just have to keep my fingers crossed that I don't go into labor in the middle of a winter storm during rush hour traffic.

I still have some loose ends to deal with involving changing. Haven't canceled my appointment with my OB that is scheduled yet. Also need to get my first trimester screening results which were sent to my OB. Oh and I have a follow up urine test to take care of next week after a round of antibiotics prescribed by my OB for a UTI that I suspected I had last week but ended up being such a stressful ordeal I never got around to blogging about it.

Was checking out askmoxie today and someone wrote in about dealing with sleep deprivation caused by her 10.5 month old twins and the neediness of her almost 5 year old daughter. After reading some of the comments from readers, I think I better just plan on having a nightmarish 2011. Everyone said that the first year with twins is Hell. Just complete Hell. And most of those people didn't even have other kids they were trying to deal with at the same time. Another consensus was that almost 5 year old kids are clingy, whiny, and incredibly needy. Want to take a guess at how old my son who tends to be more clingy and incredibly needy will be when these babies are due. Yep. Almost 5.

Maybe barfing many times a day isn't looking so bad after all...

12w

I made it! I decided to set little goals for this pregnancy and my first one was 12 weeks. I have read that most miscarriages happen before 12 weeks so here I am. Next goal is 14 weeks because at that point the chance of miscarriage goes down even more. In honor of making it this far, I decided to just tell everyone. That task was pretty easy. I just posted it in my status in facebook and within 10 minutes, I think everyone I have ever known now knows the news. In part I am glad everyone knows so I don't feel like I have to keep making excuses for why I never go anywhere anymore and really suck at answering emails. But of course this also means that if something goes wrong, I have the whole world to inform.

I called my OB yesterday to find out when I could stop using my progesterone suppositories. My RE said my OB would tell me when to stop using them and it would be around 12 weeks. My OB said I could stop using them now. So, last night was the last night of that. I am hoping that maybe there is a chance that without that extra dose of progesterone in my body, life will hand me a little less sickness. Plus, I am now 12 weeks. Keeping my fingers crossed that magically that will cure me of this illness.

I am seriously considering going back to the high risk dr for my prenatal care. I'm just so paranoid about the possibility of incompetent cervix. I know my OB said that she would make sure my cervix was measured during all my u/s but I am just not sure that is enough to make me feel confident staying with her. She said specifically that she didn't think there was any correlation between having a UU and having incompetent cervix. I don't agree with that. As I mentioned before too, I am probably going to end up at the hospital in the city anyway. They will send me there if I go early or there are any complications or the babies have to spend any time in NICU. Maybe I should just plan on going there. I have an appointment with my OB next Friday so I guess I will see how that goes before I make a decision.

11w, 3d

Off to get my first trimester genetic screening today. It was insane! Firstly because as I was waiting to get called back, a woman was escorted in by two police officers. The woman was in handcuffs that were attached to a chain around her waist. I knew that whatever happened, I was probably not having as bad of a day as she was.

I had to wait a long time since I got there early. Not sure if any fertile people will "get it" but I finally felt like I was in "the club". The area I was in just did u/s for pregnant women so all the patients who walked in were in different stages of pregnancy. Including me. I was actually one of the pregnant people.

I had kinda forgotten that I was worried about the vanishing twin thing while I sat there until my friend sent me a txt to let me know she was thinking about me today. Thankfully that didn't send me off in a tizzy of worry. Most of my worry was just to prepare myself in case there was bad news. In my heart I knew everything would be okay. Or maybe in my stomach I knew it because as much as I am throwing up I figured there still had to be two rascals in there adding to the distress.

The u/s tech was really great and nice to talk to. She found two babies right away and I breathed a small sigh of relief. It was the first time I had seen them that they actually looked like babies. It was also the first time I really felt a great connection to these babies in me. Guess it was just hard to fall in love with a little nondescript blob that made a noise like a heartbeat. But these were babies! There were heads with eye spots, noses, mouths, and what looked like it could be ears. They both had two little arms with fingered hands and two legs with toed feet.

I asked some questions and learned that the standard is to label the baby closest to the cervix as Baby A and the one further away as Baby B, so A and B should stay the same. Once they get bigger, and particularly if they are different genders, the position to the cervix won't matter quite as much because it will be pretty determined where each of them is generally located.

Baby A was pretty excited about life! The tech was laughing and kept saying things like, "How cute!" and "Isn't that adorable!" The arms were waving all over the place and the legs were kicking up a storm. Baby A kept arching its back making it bounce all over the place. The tech said she needed it to stay still for 5 seconds to get a heartrate and she was having a lot of trouble getting that to happen.

Baby B was happily snoozing, or at least chillin'. We got a quick view of Baby B's entire little hand at one point with all the little fingers which was really neat. Baby B decided it didn't want to move much at all which made it a little more difficult for the tech to get one of the measurements that she needed.

All worked out. Heartrates were 160 and 161 bpm. We could see both babies had two hemispheres in their brains, two arms, two legs, and were measuring on schedule for their number of weeks gestation. She checked out my kidneys (I have two of them) and ovaries. My left ovary looks good but my right one is measuring 14 cm, which is a half cm more than it was measuring when I was hospitalized. This sucker better start shrinking soon! It is supposed to start going down here soon, at the end of the first trimester. I'm not in pain so I guess it isn't that big of a deal.

I walked out of there happier about this pregnancy than I have been since I got a positive blood test. Pretty much everything after that has sucked: shock of having twins, illness, UTI, hospital stays, pain, sickness, and more sickness. I also walked out of there with 7 u/s pictures. Then I had to go have bloodwork done which wasn't so much fun.

The u/s tech said that at this point my uterus is stretched so that it looks like a normal uterus. This is the closest to a normal uterus I have ever had! Of course this is no indication of how my uterus is going to behave in the next couple months.

A couple more days and I am going to tell everyone in the world I'm pregnant with twins. Can't wait to get it over with.

11w, 1d

Just a couple things on my mind.

Had the worst evening ever last night. Ended up going to bed super early just because I figured the only way to stop puking was to sleep. Mostly my puking is more like gagging until I spit up. Every once in awhile it gets more like puking my guts out. My guts were puked out repeatedly last night. Tired of hearing about my puking? Yeah, I am tired of doing it.

Have to laugh every time I get an email from BabyCenter talking about how important it is to exercise during pregnancy. I would LOVE to be able to exercise right now, and I generally hate exercising. I would also LOVE to be able to do lots of other exciting things like laundry and cleaning my house and taking care of my children. Even being able to poop normally at this point would be nice. Been taking prescription colace daily and still it ends up being a really long, drawn out event, often with little success.

I am attempting a day mostly without help tomorrow. Going to the park with a friend in the morning. DH is going out in the evening. My parents are taking me and the kids out to eat for dinner so that is good and helpful. Although I am not sure I am going to go to dinner. I might just send the kids. Projectile vomiting in the middle of a restaurant isn't my idea of a good evening.

Two more days until my next u/s. Babies are supposed to be about the size of large limes at this point. Mostly just want to make sure both of them are there and growing at the same rate. I feel less pregnant in the past few days than I have in the past few weeks. I can't exactly explain what I mean by that. Maybe I just feel sick is all. Normally when I lay on my side I can feel my uterus kinda getting in the way. I haven't really noticed that the past few days.

My hair is falling out. I have a lot of long hair that generally sheds rather rapidly but this is insane. Apparently it is normal too. I'm not fearing that I will go bald or anything by the end of this pregnancy. It is just annoying.

I ate a hot dog yesterday. I know they aren't total taboo while pregnant but I have been trying to avoid them. I just really really wanted one simply because I couldn't/shouldn't have one. So I cooked one up really well to kill any bad stuff and gobbled it up in a few bites. It was highly unsatisfying. The thing I want to eat most is one of those cheap, cold Italian subs that you get from fundraisers. Once again, never care to eat those but really want one just because I am not supposed to eat deli meat. In general, I am just sick of eating. Nothing ever sounds good. I end up eating all the time because after two bites of something I have had enough of it. Five minutes later I am hungry again but then nothing sounds good again and I am tired of eating the same things all the time. Then I have to plan out when I eat what and imagine how it is going to be if it comes back up and whether it is worth the risk. Heartburn happens often so I have pretty much ruled out a bunch of food on account of its ability to make me miserable in that sense. Even when I do think of something that would be tasty or I might be kinda craving, it is something odd that we don't have on hand and of course I am too sick to just pack up a car full of kids and run out to the store to pick up something like fudgecicles just because I really want one.

Sex would be nice at this point too. That hasn't happened since the beginning of June. I have no doctor's restriction on it but the only time DH can fit sex into our schedule is in the evening, and that is the time I feel worst. A couple weeks ago all I could think about was sex and how we could fit it in. I think my libido finally gave up getting worked up knowing it just isn't going to happen.

I love water. I usually drink water with dinner and sometimes with lunch. Unless I have just been exercising though, I mostly am not a fan of just drinking water for the heck of it. Water is all I want. It has to have lots of ice in it. Cold cold water. Yumm...

I'm having an excess saliva issue. Apparently this is normal too. I feel like I just ate something sour all the time and my saliva glands are going crazy to try to flush it out. Sometimes the excess saliva is what triggers me to throw up. Sometimes I run to the bathroom thinking I might throw up and feel a lot better if I just spit in the toilet a bunch. Drinking cold cold water helps this a bit because it means all the liquid in my mouth is heading down my throat for a second instead of just sitting there being annoying.

Apart from talking about loving water, I know I sound like all I do is bitch all the time. I really don't. I don't actually bitch much at all, apart from telling my husband and mom maybe once a day how tired I am of being sick. I guess I just save up all my bitching and do it on my blog so I don't have to do it in real life.

10w, 6d

Hey. Me again. Back to complain some more about how every minute of being pregnant sucks ass. I find it hard to believe that people would ever choose to do this more than once. That sure is some dedication to avoiding the extinction of the human race that I don't have.

Went to another concert, at a bar this time. It was hell. Way worse than standing outside for 5 hour straight. The place was insanely crowded. I did manage to sneak in early and grab a seat off to the side so I didn't have to stand. Never would have made it standing. It was hotter than hell and filled with smoke. Yeah, real great place for me to be hanging out.

Then I spent a couple days thinking that maybe, just maybe, I was on the upswing of this whole morning sickness that lasts 24 hours a day thing. I went to dinner with some friends (where I couldn't manage to eat a thing but really felt okay too). I took the kids to the park, with the help of my mom. I even washed our sheets which was something that hadn't been done in such a long time that I am not even about to admit how long. Now that I have realized that I more or less have an unlimited supply of Zofran, I haven't been hesitant to take it. Unfortunately, the Zofran has now decided to be hesitant in actually preventing me from puking my guts out randomly.

So yeah, the puking has really picked up. My puking in the past was generally just stuff coming up and me not really retching. I puked, I rinsed, I went on with my day. Now it is losing entire meals and gagging and retching until my body is most certainly sure that every last ounce of food product has been emptied from my stomach and my eyes have nearly popped from my head. Good times. Did I mention how awesome being pregnant is??

Did have dinner with a couple friends a few days ago. I had planned to tell them I was knocked up and planned to leave out the fact that our family would go from 4 to 6 members. I was doing good. Told them pretty much as soon as I sat at the table. Then just before we were ready to leave the one girl asked that since we did fertility treatments, what the chances were of having more than one. I said 100%. Then I felt kinda bad I didn't just tell them to begin with but they understood. After talking with these ladies, I started questioning whether it was really a great idea to drop my high risk dr. The main thing is that if anything goes wrong or I go into labor early, I am just going to be shipped off to the hospital in the city anyway. I should just probably plan on being there. If I am going to be there anyway, wouldn't it make more sense to have a doctor that actually was affiliated with the place? Then again, I am still really concerned about having to drive to the city in labor during rush hour traffic in a snow storm. Probably just be easier to go to the local hospital and have them load me into an ambulance and get me there. For now I am sticking with my regular OB but keeping an open mind.

Finally caught up with all my girls that I am closest to on Sunday and spilled the beans to them. So glad about that on so many levels. One girl is already planning on cooking dinner for my family next week. Also loved the shocked expressions of everyone. Mostly though, that is the last time I am going to explain myself. Everyone else in this world announces they are adding a family member to their families and everyone says congrats and moves on. This is the third time we have made this announcement and each time it has come with some grand explanation as to why we decided to go this route and how it all happened. I most certainly don't mind explaining all this to my close friends, but why should I have to explain at all? No one else ever gets asked how their child was conceived, or better yet, why they decided to conceive a child instead of adopt one. So, my plan is to not explain anymore. I am not sure how this is going to work out. In part it will help because here really soon I will give my mom the green light to tell everyone and she can decide to explain or not to explain and I won't have to. As for all the people who are bound to ask me questions that I don't feel I should have to answer, I'm sure I'll figure something out. Guess that is one more advantage of the internet and facebook. I can just tell everyone online and dodge questions without having to do so while staring them in the eye.

Only 8 more days until I hit the magical 12 week mark. People keep telling me that is when the morning sickness gets better. It better damn well get better.

10w

Survived the concert with flying colors. All it took was lots of hydration, planning ahead, and Zofran. I was able to score a great "seat" about 100 feet from the stage but in the end decided to abandon it and the insane amount of people in such close proximity. In the end, I did much better than a friend of mine who ended up so dehydrated he took a trip to the ER after the show.

Been avoiding blogging because all I would be doing is complaining about how crappy I feel. I throw up often and just feel sick all the time. Although I did manage that concert, that was four days ago and I haven't felt well enough to leave the house since. Been paranoid a lot about having a twin "vanish". I know there aren't supposed to be any signs, but I keep feeling pain/burning in my uterus and I am convinced it is because something is going wrong. It has taken me several weeks to come to terms with the fact that I am pregnant with two and I am just not ready to have to get used to being pregnant with just one.

Made the mistake of watching a couple videos on BabyCenter about babies in the NICU. Now I am crying. I figured even with just one baby, my baby would likely end up there. Now I have two fighting over a limited amount of space so I am certain we will be spending lots of time there. I've got all these questions in my head, mainly just "how can I do it?" I know it is stupid to even ask myself that. I have asked myself that question countless times in my life and the answer is just the same. You just do it. When you think you can't possibly have the strength to deal with something, you find you have more strength than you ever knew.

I made an appointment for next Friday for first trimester Downs Syndrome Screening. The only reason I want the screening done is for another u/s. I need to know if there were any major changes in health or number of fetuses hanging out in this uterus of mine.

My mom has still been coming over every day to help with the kids. I'm a huge control freak which of course means that I like to know and control my kids' schedule. I've had to let go of that. My mom comes and goes with my kids and sometimes I don't even know where my kids are and rarely know when they will be back. I normally do my best to make healthy choices when it comes to my kids. My mom almost always gives them lunch which is typically pizza or fast food or some mystery meal that they eat outside of my house. I've even given up a lot of control over my own life. I usually find myself eating fast food maybe once a year. I have eaten twice in the last week because it is just easier to eat whatever my mom shows up with than to try to make something on my own. I haven't been to the grocery store in over a month. DH does all the shopping. I have gotten up the energy to cook dinner last night but even then, I have been picking things that are easy to cook without sacrificing too much nutritional value. I have good intentions each day to try to have some sort of normalcy. Then I try to do laundry and find that halfway through a load I am bowing to the porcelain god. I try to play with my kids but then they just start jumping on me and I fear for my uterus. I try to water the garden and I get lightheaded. So, I mostly spend my days thinking how soon this sickness will end and maybe I will get an inkling of my life back for a couple months before I end up on bedrest or learning to be the parent of more kids. My mom purchased me two maternity t-shirts today which I don't need yet. I'm more worried about having pants and shorts that fit. So far my normal clothes have fit but I see an end to that soon. Still waiting for my Bella Band to show up. Mostly I am living in denial about the fact that my entire body (and life) is changing and I am going to need a new wardrobe. I didn't need a new wardrobe with my first two kids.

I've turned out to be far different pregnant person than I thought I would be. I think mostly because I already have two kids. I've never taken care of a newborn before, but I have taken care of two babies. I figured I would be crazy about making to do lists and learning everything I possibly could about pregnancy and baby care. Yeah, not so much. Part of me refuses to do much because I know I am in quite a non-normal pregnancy. Even if I make it through this awful first trimester, that doesn't mean it is going to lead to us having another child or two in this family. I hate to think that way but I am trying to be realistic too.

Taking these babies to their second concert tomorrow. This one is just in a bar though and not a giant stadium filled with drunk people. I'm not nearly as concerned about surviving this show.

9w, 3d

I got my body pillow delivered and have slept with it two nights now. Super comfortable... except... I guess it is a bit more fluffy than I need. I am just not used to sleeping with a pillow between my legs to begin with and I think my poor legs are forced to be a bit further apart than natural. Now my butt muscles hurt. It is like I have been doing exercises to firm my butt but really all I have been doing is sleeping... which is actually pretty awesome!

I've been plagued with killer headaches. I read something the other day that headaches are common at this point in pregnancy. Now I am not feeling so hot, feel like puking all the time, and my head is about to explode. Good times. I LOVE being pregnant. I've popped a few Tylenol in the past couples days. It kinda took the edge off today but there was no beating that headache I had yesterday.

Today was my first official OB appointment. I used to see this ob/gyn when I was 18-23 years old or so but haven't seen her in the past 8 or so years. She is great and has a wonderful bedside manner. She was also really easy to talk to. I voiced my concerns about incompetent cervix and she told me that she wasn't really concerned. Yeah, easy for her to say. However, she did say that I will receive some additional monitoring because of the twin thing and she will just make sure that my cervix is measured during all my u/s. We talked a little about birth. She said that if everything is fine of course she would be good with me doing a vaginal birth but I can pretty much expect a c-section since my uterus is strangely shaped increasing my chances of breech babies and the fact that there are two of them in there. I always really wanted to attempt a vaginal birth (with lots of drugs) just so I could get the full having a baby experience. After being diagnosed with a UU, I came to realize that my chances of getting to have a vaginal birth were greatly reduced. Since becoming pregnant with twins, I have pretty much given up on the thought and am perfectly fine with them cutting these kids out and me avoiding labor pains all together. Right now I will only be upset if I don't get to be conscious during the birth of my kids. I missed the birth of my first two so I would really like to be there this time.

Anyway, back to the appointment. She did a quick exam and some test for bacteria that is normal in adults but could be harmful for the babies. She said she could definitely tell there was something going on in my uterus. She said that just by the looks of my cervix, it looked perfectly normal, appeared to have good blood flow, and was centered instead of being pushed off to the side like my uterus is. She figured she would give listening for heartbeats a try with the doppler. Said there was a chance she could hear them but likely wouldn't be able to hear them until around 12 weeks. She found my heart beat rather quickly and noted that it was really strong so hopefully that meant good blood supply to my uterus. She was able to locate at least one of the baby's heartbeats. There was a bit of an echo which could have either been just an echo or else the other baby's heartbeat. She gave me this huge excited smile. I smiled back. I guess I was supposed to be overwhelmed with the miracle of life within me but since I have seen and heard the heartbeats before, I guess I just wasn't that fascinated. Or maybe my head was just pounding with so much pain at the moment I couldn't think of much else.

Got our first bill from my hospital stay while on vacation. The original cost of service was over $10,000. Insurance covered most of that. Still, what an expensive vacation!

Tomorrow is the big concert day that I am hoping I survive. I am far more nervous about going to the concert than I am excited about it at this point.

9w

This being sick thing is getting old. I figured I am on about my 4th week of being totally incapable of doing anything. My mom has been here every day while DH is working. It is getting old. I feel like I don't do anything with my kids, but at the same time, I just can't do anything with my kids. I can hang for maybe an hour but then I just have to lay down because I either feel like I might die of sickness or I am ready to puke or I have a huge headache or a combination of all of the above. Most of my interaction with my kids today involved yelling at them for all their bad habits that they have picked up from being under the supervision of my mom who lets them get away with murder (or at least disrespectful attitudes, laziness, and constant whining).

Sleeping sucks. I nap most days but managed to go today without. I don't know if it is the naps or feeling sick or heartburn or all of the above, but I just can't stay asleep all night. I'm up peeing or needing a drink or being uncomfortable or just laying there wide awake at 4 am for no real reason.

I'm tired of eating. I can't eat large meals so I end up snacking all day. It is pretty much the only reason I get off the couch - because I am hungry yet again. Nothing ever sounds good to eat but usually everything tastes pretty good.

Been having a heatwave around here so going outside really hasn't even been an option. I managed to spend several hours outside on the Fourth of July only to feel like death by 9:30 and resort to throwing up salsa. Really, if you think there is a chance you might vomit, don't eat salsa.

Throwing up has pretty much become a daily occurrence. Now it seems to happen while I am searching through my purse for my Zofran. Throwing up really isn't that bad. I can deal with it. It is the feeling so awful all day long that I am done with. And in those moments when I think maybe it is all in my head and really I am not even pregnant, throwing up is actually kind of reassuring. Guess that makes me some sort of sicko.

The hives are gone! I itched for three days straight and then they just started disappearing.

I have an appointment with my OB on Friday. I got spoiled with all that time I spent in the hospital and all those u/s I had. I want another one! I'm pretty freaked out about the whole vanishing twin possibility. Whatever happens, happens, and I can deal with that. I just want to KNOW that it happened. I don't want to have to go another month thinking we are having two and then have an u/s and find out there is only one in there. That would just be a mean trick. I've dealt with too much crap during these nine weeks to welcome in any more mean tricks.

A bunch more people know I am pregnant. My mom misunderstood something I said and told three of her friends - the three with the biggest mouths. My brother-in-law said that now pretty much the entire tri-state area knows. I probably would be mad at her but I just don't care. My normal personality is rather explosive so maybe all these excess hormones are making me mellow. More likely, I am just too busy keeping my head above water and not drowning in sickness to sweat the small stuff. My mom only told these people that I was pregnant, and not that at the last check there were two things in there.

I made my first pregnancy related purchases. I ordered a body pillow and figured while I was ordering things, I would pick up one of those Bella Band things too. I am in definite need of the pillow. No need for the Bella Band yet.

I'm having issues with getting my progesterone suppositories refilled. They were supposed to be here today. They are not. Not sure if the new pharmacy that we have to use with DH's new insurance with his new job ever got the prescription. I know I should get on top of that but it is hard enough for me to get a shower everyday.

I can't believe I made it to 10:00 with no nap today. Off to try to sleep.

8w, 3d

Still here. Still feeling pretty worthless. I set a goal for myself the last two days and today to cook dinner and to do a load of laundry. Today was the first day I accomplished both goals. I was able to cook dinner the past two days but laundry was a distant dream. Got both things done today. It was a successful day!

Turns out these babies hate bananas. Ate one yesterday morning for breakfast and shortly after, I got a refund. Had one today around lunch time and got the same result. I guess I am off bananas.

I have been struck down with a horrible case of hives. I was thinking that it was from the antibiotic I was taking for my UTI. I wasn't really sure when I was supposed to stop taking it because I wasn't taking my own pills while I was in the hospital but I know there were several occasions that they gave me some while there. I figured it couldn't hurt to keep taking the ones I had. Then I got the hives. I get hives when I take penicillin and amoxicillin so it seemed like a likely candidate. I have never experienced hives like this before. They cover me. My scalp itches like crazy. Both arms are covered from shoulder to finger tip. My hands swelled up so badly that I couldn't make fists and no longer am wearing my wedding rings. My entire torso has become nothing but different sizes of solid red welts that continue down my thighs. Today the hives finally showed up on my lower legs and feet. I spent all day Wednesday itching like mad and taking Benedryl that helped mildly. Yesterday I decided to look up hives and pregnancy online. Apparently about 1% of pregnant people get hives as a result of changing hormones and it is more common in twin pregnancies. Lucky me always gets to fall into the 1% of everything. The website I saw yesterday said some doctors prescribe Claritin, but usually not in the first trimester. I had been taking Claritin for allergies prior to becoming pregnant. My RE said I could continue to take it but decided to stop anyway. I went back on the Claritin yesterday. Not sure if it was the drug or just the course the hives were taking, but I was mostly non-itchy yesterday. The hives came back at night time. I itched all through the night, took a Claritin this morning, and had relief for the most part again. The website I saw said that the hives aren't a concern and in most women they go away within 4 weeks of delivery. Wow, so I only have to wait until then? Although more likely I will fall into the 1% of women who have hives during pregnancy and then end up never getting rid of them for life.

Today was the first day in weeks I haven't spent some time thinking I was so sick that surely I was near death. I had a few pretty bad moments but nothing compared to what I have been feeling. It gives me hope that maybe an end is in sight, even if the end is weeks away. As for now I am just hoping that next Saturday is a good day. I have been looking forward to attending an outdoor concert with lots of screaming/drunk people at least 10 years younger than me. Having morning sickness was never part of the plan. A couple days ago the forecast for the concert was 92 degrees and humid. Yeah, not sure I could do that. I looked today and now it says high of 79 and chance of thunderstorms. I can do cooler weather and rain. I hope. Or else I'll end up being that 1% of people who gets struck my lightening.