Cycle 2, CD 2

A couple things:

- Finally got my blood work results from getting retested for my elevated sugar level and white blood cell count when I called yesterday to make my day 3 baseline appointment. Everything came back normal. Yay!

- Saw my friend J today. She is a foster parent and had a new foster son with her who is 4 months old. I held him the entire time we were together. The poor little guy was removed from his home last week because he pretty much was not being fed. At 4 months old he weighed 8 lbs. He has gained 2 lbs in the past week being in J's care. I have officially been sucked into baby fever with that little guy. I'm still not sure that if things don't work out with having a biological child that I am ready to jump into the world of adoption yet again. But at the same time, something has changed. I know I want a baby in my life. I want to know what it is like to care for a little baby, something I have never done. It was also nice to be reminded that your heart has so much room to love a child that needs loved whether that child is biologically yours or not. You would think that as a mother of two adopted children, you don't need to be reminded of that. After being the mother of two adopted children for several years, it is really easy to forget that they weren't always your children. All that is for another post though.

- DS1 informed me quite seriously today that he did not like me holding that baby. Poor kid has enough sibling rivalry with his brother. Guess I'll have to add "issues with adjusting to a new sibling" to the list of worries I have over all this actually working.

- About an hour after I found out I was pregnant with Emily the Embryo, I went to a friend's house to visit with a bunch of my friends. We haven't been telling most people about our fertility treatments but two of my friends that were there knew. That day I picked a place on the couch and when C came in, I quickly whispered the news to her that I was pregnant. Today I went to that same friend's house. A couple friends were there including C. I had this huge moment of deja-vu and pretty much dread and panic. I walked into the room and realized that the only logical place for me to sit was that same place I was sitting last time I was there. The last time I was there I sat on that spot on the couch and was pregnant. It was such an exciting day and I had good news to share. That seems so long ago. There was a moment when this all hit me and I suddenly felt like throwing up. Then I remembered to be strong, be an adult, and not be so weirded out by something that meant nothing. I sat. I chatted. I forgot all about throwing up.

- Started yesterday with taking all my getting ready to get pregnant meds again. I have been taking the prenatal vitamins for months now and never stopped that. Also been taking Fish Oil. I usually don't remember to take it 3 times a day like I am supposed to but started trying to really remember to do that. Also, back onto self-medicating with baby aspirin. I took it last cycle and ended up (kinda sorta) pregnant. I stopped taking it as soon as I found out the pregnancy was in the rudimentary horn since I knew likely I would have surgery. Started taking it again yesterday. Here's to good uterine blood flow!

Cycle 1, CD 3

I had to go in this morning to get my baseline blood work and ultrasound done. Being that it is a Saturday, DH was here so I didn't have to worry about taking the kids with me. I also didn't have to worry about traffic but left a little early because you just never know around here when a road might suddenly be under construction. It took me 45 minutes to get there and another 10 minutes to get parked and up to the floor where my office is. I was about 35 minutes early.

First up was my blood work. I was told that they couldn't find my chart. Lovely. The woman said I would feel a little pinch. That was the biggest little pinch I have ever felt from getting my blood drawn. I felt a little foggy-headed afterward. I guess she did a good job though because there isn't a bruise at all.

Then it was waiting some more until I got called back for my u/s. They had located my chart by then. I was told to go in the bathroom, undress from the waist down, empty my bladder, and was given a sheet to cover up with. The u/s tech was checking out my chart when I came in. I had decided on the drive in that I am just going to tell every u/s tech that I encounter during this process about my UU so I know that they know what they are looking at. I told the tech and also said that only my right ovary is connected to my uterus. She said she had just read that in my chart. I wasn't sure what kind of u/s this was going to be but it was a trans vaginal u/s. So I hung out, and wondered how the heck that is all going to work out when I have to have an almost 3 year old and a 3 year old with me. The u/s tech was focusing a lot of attention on my left side, the side where my rudimentary horn is. She asked me how I was diagnosed with a UU. I said, "First an HSG, then confirmed with MRI, then further confirmed with a lap/hyst." She kept looking at her screen confused. I said, "Oh, and I have a rudimentary horn on the left." Apparently that was what was confusing her. She said she saw something over there that looked kind of like a uterus but couldn't figure it out. The whole u/s took about 15 minutes. Seriously, how am I going to be able to do that with two little kids with me? Guess I will find out. As I was leaving the room the u/s tech asked me again what test showed that I had a rudimentary horn. Even though I am pretty much used to my uterus at this point, I do get tired of explaining it. It makes me feel like a freak.

On the way home I stopped and picked up some Vitamin D and baby aspirin. I have read a lot recently about how Vitamin D deficiency doesn't help things in the fertility department. Since I haven't seen the sun here for a couple days and don't expect to see it again until spring, I figure it won't hurt. I also heard a lot recently about aspirin can help conception, particularly for women with MA's. Blood flow to the uterus for people with MA's tends to be compromised since we weren't quit put together right, and that can cause problems implantation and maintaining a pregnancy. So, I am self-medicating.

A couple hours later they called. One of the RE's at my office (not the one that I usually see) reviewed my blood work and u/s results. I am to start my Gonal-F injections tonight at 75 iu. I'll do that tonight, tomorrow, and Monday, and then Tuesday morning I have to go back in for more blood work and another u/s. Tuesday I get to do it with the kids.

I don't really know yet exactly how this whole Gonal-F injection thing works. I have directions but until I actually do it, it all seems complicated to me. I got to thinking. When I give myself these injections, I am supposed to do it one night to the right of my belly button and the next night to the left. I wonder if it would hurt anything to just do it on the same side every night? I think it is probably mostly so you don't get a sore belly, but I am thinking that my right ovary is really the only one that I am interested in stimulating, since the left one is kind of just hanging out only attached to that rudimentary horn.